For the Moore Theological College Revue 2025
Lyrics
A community service announcement
from the Acting Academic Dean
Re: Essays and Assignments at Moore Theological College
As we mark multiple anonymous essays,
we know the gospel matters most.
We seek to show love and grace.
But FYI, this is what we really want—
what we really, really want…
Yo, I’ll tell you what I want, what I really really want.
So tell me what you want, what you really really want.
YOU tell me what you want, what you really really want.
I’ll tell you what I want, what I really really want.
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna,
I wanna really really really see you follow our style.
If you want your marker
to love what you write,
if you want to make us feel
a glow of pride,
try not to trigger
our pedantic minds.
Get your act together;
we could be just fine.
I’ll tell you what I want, what I really really want:
publication titles in italic font
and semicolons separating chapters of Scripture,
commas for verses, colons for a mixture.
A semicolon is not a colon
& ampersands, they get me rollin’
in pain, like a cover sheet without a question number
or lexicon citations overly encumbered
with publication details. They’re useless and wrong.
They make your footnotes ridiculously long.
And if you really really wanna stay out of trouble:
no single quotation marks; IT’S DOUBLE!
(ATTENTION:) If you wannabe my student,
the Style Guide is your friend.
Click to find the Handbook
and scroll down to the end.
If you wanna write an essay,
this is where you live.
Readin’ it’s not easy
but that’s the way it is.
I’ll tell you what I want, what I really really want:
no contracted forms; they’re too nonchalant.
“Don’t,” “can’t,” “won’t” in formal text
I do not, cannot, will not respect,
like the pronoun “I”-“me”-“my” collection.
Save that for your personal reflection.
And this is what provokes me down to my core:
“they’re” instead of “their” and “you’re” instead of “your”!
And something else makes me deeply disturbed.
A so-called sentence without a verb.
Or two real sentences stuck to each other
with no full stop, don’t do it brother!
And here’s a game changer: three kinds of line.
There’s hyphen, en dash, em dash, right?
So this the rule you gotta re-hash:
Bible verse ranges use an en dash!
(REMINDER:) If you wannabe my student,
the Style Guide is your friend (Style Guide is your friend).
Click to find the Handbook
and scroll down to the end.
If you wanna write an essay,
this is where you live (Style Guide’s where you live).
Readin’ it’s not easy
but that’s the way it is.
(Keyboard solo)
(Bass solo)
I’ll tell you what I want, what I really really want:
no quotation marks around your Greek font.
Use lexical forms unless quoting text.
Remove “show comments” from PDFs.
No grave accent to close Greek quotations
and footnotes don’t precede punctuation.
If you’ve got two sources you wanna cite
use just one footnote. Do it right!
John Piper’s blog is not a scholarly source.
He’s written books; read them of course!
For a context statement, a paragraph is plenty,
but not just a quote from the end of John twenty.
(Bridge)
One last style tip before we retire:
if you wanna make jokes about our attire,
take a look at yourself, at least just a glance,
and check if you happen to be wearing track pants!
(TO REITERATE:) If you wannabe my student,
the Style Guide is your friend (Style Guide is your friend).
Click to find the Handbook
and scroll down to the end.
If you wanna write an essay,
this is where you live (Style Guide’s where you live).
Readin’ it’s not easy
but that’s the way it is.
Well, now we’ve got that off our chests,
we’ll keep showing love and grace.
Please be kind to us too…
If you wanna be my student
(student, student, student …)
Style Guide | Moore Revue 2025
by Lionel & Harry Windsor
featuring: Susan An
guest stars: Tony, Mad Wee McCharles, Tom, The Style Guys, The spAIce Girls
Cinematography: Ellie & Bron
Vibe coordinator: Aggie