Excessive reactions to praise and sympathy

This is a section of a longer paper. There is a roadmap for the entire paper, and you can download the PDF.

Those who exhibit SBCMB tend to display over-the-top reactions to praise and sympathy.

For example, you might mention something you appreciate about a person, in order to be affirming and thankful, or even just polite, as would be expected in a normal human interaction. Or you might give a simple expression of sympathy if you hear of a difficulty they’ve experienced (e.g. “I’m sorry to hear that”). Normally, you would expect the person to respond with a simple “thanks” or similar.

However, a person exhibiting SBCMB may give a disconcerting, over-the-top response, such as “You don’t realise how that much that means to me,” or “People don’t normally appreciate me like that,” or “Thanks so much, I feel like we’ve really connected now.” This can happen even if you have only just started to relate to the person and don’t know them very well, or if you have only just reconnected with them after a prolonged period of not relating.

Note that this behaviour tends to be very one-sided. That is, the person is unlikely to exhibit the same kind of praise or empathy towards you. It is true that they might praise you, but their praise of you will likely be based primarily on how well you have responded to them and their needs rather than on anything independently praiseworthy about you or your actions (see further below).

Read the next section: Initial (selective) love-bombing

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To read the whole paper: Slow-burn crazy-making behaviours