This is a section of a longer paper. There is a roadmap for the entire paper, and you can download the PDF.
If you are entangled deeply in the distorted reality of a person exhibiting SBCMB and feeling significantly gaslighted, it is right to recognise it and name it. As we mentioned, you might need to cut off contact just to recover. That sounds hard, but it is actually that serious, and it is not wrong to stop relating to such a person. If you start to doubt your ability to discern reality because the other person has criticised you for criticising them, this is certainly the time to stop relating, at least for a time. It is very helpful at this point to talk to others whom you trust. Describe your experiences and ask them to help you reflect on it all. This can help you to recalibrate your view of reality and to recover from the situation.
Read the next section: If you believe there is actually abuse, take further action
Copyright © 2021 Lionel and Bronwyn Windsor
Note well: Because of time and energy constraints, we’re not personally able to respond to any queries or comments about this paper. So please realise in advance that if you send us a message about this paper, you are unlikely to receive any response from us.
To read the whole paper: Slow-burn crazy-making behaviours
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Lift Yours Eyes is a series of 70 reflections covering every sentence in Paul’s letter to the Ephesians. It’s also available in audio podcast format. You can see all the posts in the series, and connect to the audio podcast using the platform of your choice, by following this link.